Dream Dad

Casey and Connor were climbing a giant totem pole that came crashing down on top of Casey. He broke his back and was hobbling around (Dream Interpretation: Casey smashed his foot and is hobbling around).

Dad showed up wearing a tropical shirt after being in Florida for a hella long time (Dream Interpretation: He's dead and has been for awhile). He brought us chocolate covered pretzels as a souvenir (Dream Interpretation: I love chocolate covered pretzels).

I hugged him for the rest of the dream while Casey hobbled around in the background (Dream Interpretation: I want to hug my dad and Casey is still hobbling around).

It was actually a great dream because I could feel the hug. I feel a little bad for Dream Casey, but he refused treatment.

Lessons from Kurt

I've been trying to take a little advice from Kurt Vonnegut. He suggests when we feel happy, we should exclaim, murmur or think, "If this isn't nice, I don't know what is."

Dead Parent Society meetings, Cub's games and an almost biweekly kiss from my boyfriend. Things could always be much better. Still, things are quite nice.

Ting-a-ling, you son of a bitch!

Initiation

Last weekend we initiated three new members into the Dead Parent Club. This club sucks. I can't put it on my resume, and we don't have a clubhouse. At least the meetings usually consist of beer, laughter, family and tears - crucial components of healing. Unfortunately, members never heal completely; they just learn to live with the wounds.

So it goes...

"There's no normal life, Wyatt. There's just life. Now get on with it," said Doc Holiday.

"But he didn't mention how much my heart would ache," said D.

I loved this poem in middle school. Still do.

Nature's first green is gold, her hardest hue to hold.

Her early leaf's a flower, but only so an hour.

Then leaf subsides to leaf.

So Eden sank to grief, so dawn goes down to day.

Nothing gold can stay.

LQ

I Don't Make New Year's Resolutions, But...

I am trying a few things to improve myself.

1. I brought a brush, a lint roller and an extra toothbrush with toothpaste to work. I am trying to brush my teeth during the day, especially after I drink tea. I am sure I look really put-together today. I've brushed my hair and teeth, and rolled my lint.

2. My office kitchen has a constant supply of cookies/candy/giant caramel apples. Most days, I can't say no. So, I've started flicking off and quietly cursing the dessert tray when I walk into the kitchen. Seriously. I think it's working. I just hope no one catches me. People here already think I'm weird.

3. I am going to buy new clothes. I say this about 3 times a month, but I am dedicated now. I need to stop cycling through the same outfits every week. People are starting to notice.

4. I need to go to more concerts. I've been in Chicago for 4 months, and I've only been to one show! Unacceptable. I just bought tickets to Tegan & Sara in March to get me started.

LQ

Optimisim on Bus #145

The man sitting across from me was carrying seven shopping bags. He talked (not sure if it was to me, but I was definitely the only one listening) about how he bought everything with his Official NBA Credit Card. He spent the first 9 minutes of the ride boasting the benefits of the card (personalized team logo! unlimited merchandise! points with each purchase!) and then fell silent for a few minutes.

He looked at me and said, "If all else fails, we can pull this thing over and have a cup of hot chocolate."

I found myself agreeing with him. It made total sense at the time.

Music

Tony (uncle/Godfather) mailed me a CD containing the tunes he is currently listening to (how awesome is that? I love giving/receiving new music.)

The first song is "Homeless" by Guy Clark.

Does he know how much I think about homeless people?! (My journalism professors hate interrobangs. I love them!?!?)

This could only mean:

1. Tony still reads my blog, and noticed the mention of homeless people reminding me of my dad; or

2. Homeless people remind Tony of my dad; or

3. He just likes the song.

Tony: If you are reading this, THANK YOU! I love the CD.

Kelly (cousin) also recently gave me an excellent CD. However, it came with a cautionary note to "take with beer." I did just that.

Shannon (aunt) gave me two couch pillows she made with material she bought while drunk. She thought it would make a great shirt, but in fact, really only makes good pillows.

What a lovely family.

On another note, I have given up "sweets" until Thanksgiving (if you don't think this is a lofty goal, then you don't know me). Does Bailey's Irish Cream count as a "sweet"? It was on sale yesterday, and I couldn't resist. If it does, then I've failed on day one.